Good day my lovelies. I want to talk today about the power of eye contact. I’m going to speak from the feminine perspective some because the power we hold as women is often suppressed, however, a lot of this could apply to men too. For the guys reading this, take what resonates with you and please feel free to share your perspective in the comments.
Like any social animal, how we hold our gaze is a reflection of what we feel and communicates to those around us. I’m not going to spend too much time on this because I think we all know that holding eye contact shows confidence, a glaring stare may suggest aggression, while averting the eyes may be a sign of passivity or discomfort or even submission. A lingering gaze may indicate sensuality or passion. Women learn to master communicating with their eyes from a young age and with one look can project sympathy, concern, pride, vehemence or any number of other emotions. I don’t think this is a major revelation to anyone.
I want to focus on bringing awareness to my gaze. Noticing how I hold eye contact, when I’m holding it in confidence and when I’m averting it in passivity. Who are the people I hold eye contact with? Who are the ones who cause me to pull my eyes away?
I’m a woman, a mother, a wife and a working professional who is often asked to give presentations around the country. I feel confident in general and I spend most of my time right on the line between introverted and extroverted. It surprises me sometimes, how I can fall into a pattern of passivity with my gaze. I walk into the office in the morning and say hello to everyone, but do I actually look at anyone? Not always. After a long day of work, I kiss my husband hello, but do I catch his eyes? I’m not even sure. Do I in the morning when I kiss him goodbye? Maybe.
I have a coworker who often withholds eye contact when we talk. Her aversion has made me more aware of my own. It’s also made me aware of the power we hold in our gaze. The information we get from making eye contact is closely linked to intuition, possibly even clairvoyance. There is all this subtle information that is shared with us when we hold someone’s gaze, even for a split second. It’s made me wonder how much I’m missing; how much information I’m choosing to let go. This week, eye contact will be part of my mindfulness practice. I started this morning, and I’ve already forgotten to pay attention several times. (That’s why it’s called practice I guess.)
I don’t want to give the impression that holding eye contact is good and withholding it is bad. I don’t think that’s true. It is a tool we use as humans. After all, there are times when making ourselves unnoticeable is convenient. But, I also think we benefit when we’re able to identify imbalances within ourselves. In America (and in other countries, I’m sure) women have lost much of their power (men have too for that matter) through a disconnection from the divine feminine. We have fallen out of touch with the feminine aspects of ourselves and often fail to honor that which gives life, growth, abundance and death. Emphasis is put on always doing (taking action) rather than receiving (renewal and restoration). Eye contact has a lot to do with receiving. Can bringing awareness back to our gaze help us to reconnect to our origins, when there was balance between sacred masculine and sacred feminine energies? Will it help us connect with the goddess aspect?∞
Share your thoughts in the comments.